Southwell visited Clifton on a beautiful summer's day in search of their first win in Division H of the 2017 South Notts Cricket League. There are not many harder places to gain 20 points. Clifton 2nd XI were third in the division at the start of play and, perhaps of greater concern, played in Division B in the previous season. The Clifton 1st XI had finished three places above relegation in the Notts Premier League in 2016, yet deemed themselves noncompetitive at that level and requested they be demoted to Division B of the SNCL. This was in place of their 2nd XI who consequently dropped into Division H. The Clifton 1st XI are now, unsurprisingly, sitting comfortably at the top of Division B, thus highlighting the singular nature of this decision.

Welbeck, the Manchester City of Nottinghamshire cricket, would have been relegated from the Premier League in 2016, yet stayed up due to Clifton's unexpected demotion. How convenient. If Clifton 1st XI had remained in the top division this season, been less than competitive and got relegated they would have been playing in Division A of the SNCL in 2018. As Clifton's request for a two division relegation was sanctioned by the SNCL and the Premier League, their likely promotion this season means they will still find themselves playing in Division A in 2018. You can make your own judgement on the rights and wrongs of this chain of events but this is investigative journalism at its best. Or maybe a gossip column at its worst.

Clifton is a beautiful place to play cricket, quintessentially English and in the grounds of Nottingham Trent University. They provide great teas too. However, they neglected to provide an umpire or a scorer and had to be reminded more than once to provide drinks part way through each innings. When Keith Burkinshaw left Tottenham Hotspur in 1984 after securing the UEFA Cup, he remarked that 'there used to be a football club over there'. Different sport, same sentiment?

Six of the Clifton side had played for the 2nd XI which finished seventh in Division B in 2016 and a tough task awaited Southwell. After two successive wins, normal service was resumed as Stuart Grimley lost the toss and Clifton chose to bat first. There was a bit of green on the pitch and with Abin Mathew partnering Devon McCarthy with the new ball, Southwell would have been hopeful of an early breakthrough. They say if you can't say anything nice about someone that you shouldn't say anything at all. Clifton opener Brad Moore scored 41. His partner Saqib Shah played an array of offensive strokes and put Southwell under a fair bit of pressure early on before he nibbled Mathew behind for a run-a-ball 45. Either side of the dismissals of the two openers, Sharath Rajan took out the off stump of Clifton number three Ryan MacMillan for a duck. At the time of the drinks break, Clifton were well set on 107-3 with Ul-Haq and Varma at the crease.

The two middle order batsman looked very settled, pushed the run rate up to five an over and, with a strong finish, could have pushed the 280 mark. Southwell turned to their very own magic man, Richard Maloney, to break the partnership. He did not disappoint, bowling a line tighter than his wallet he clean bowled Ul-Haq for 45 as he went for another huge swipe, before having both Varma and Kitty caught by McCarthy for 50 and 8 respectively. This slowed down the run rate considerably and meant Clifton could not properly accelerate during the last five overs of their innings. This was compounded further by Grimley and Sharath taking a wicket each as the innings came to a somewhat mundane close. Clifton finished on 231-8 off their 45 overs. It was a good score but not as large as would have been expected at the 25 over mark and left Southwell with three out of the four bowling bonus points on offer.

After a plentiful tea, Tom Clarke and Adam Gell opened up the Southwell innings. A solid start was made and fifteen risk-free runs accumulated, before Clarke was bowled by the leading wicket-taker in Division H, the Clifton captain Saqib Shah. He had opened the batting and the bowling, as well as hiding himself strategically in the field. Grimley looked on enviously. The mercurial McCarthy strode to the crease, possibly the most talented player on either side and capable of chasing 231 down on his own on given the right conditions, with a point to prove. Although McCarthy tried to channel his inner Joe Root and lead his team to victory, he instead channeled his inner Nasser Hussain and ran out Gell for 13. The ball was behind square and Gell, standing at the non-striker's end, was the one to call for a cheeky single. However, it feels wrong to blame a 14 year old boy for this dismissal and McCarthy acknowledged the error was his.

McCarthy exacerbated the Southwell collapse as he fell to a stunning catch just four balls later in the same over and the middle order was called upon once again to turn around the difficult situation. Charlie Ogrizovic was the next man in. Ogrizovic with his face like a baby turtle. Ogrizovic with his face like a deflated football. Ogrizovic with his face like disappointed watermelon. Ogrizovic with his face walking off the pitch after scoring six. Jack Foster departed next for five, harshly adjudged lbw by the best looking umpire in the league, before Sam Barber was dismissed courtesy of a world-class catch by Clifton wicket-keeper Ryan MacMillan. Sometimes it is just not your day.

With Southwell reaching the halfway stage at 60-6, the result of the game was heavily in favour of Clifton and Southwell were still 53 runs shy of the first batting point. Never fear. Lord's has Old Father Time but Southwell has Old Father Grimley. In conjunction with Mr Dependable, Sharath Rajan, Southwell started to restore some pride. No risks were taken until the 28th over when Grimley got a little too excited and was dismissed for 28, caught in the deep by Kutty. This brought Mathew to the crease, who was not in the mood to scratch about and see out the overs. He gave the pitch and the bowler, Haider Ali, all of one ball to decide what he was going to. The next ball went for six.

With Sharath quietly accumulating runs at one end, the scoreboard was ticking over at an impressive rate, the first batting point being achieved in the 34th over. Mathew was not content with this and launched another huge six deep into the trees surrounding the ground. It was so big that only the nearby Trent University students could calculate where it landed. Mathew was eventually out for 23, before Rahul Rajan joined Sharath at the crease. Rahul instantly notched up the second batting point before Sharath was bowled for 38 by the returning Shah, who finished with the impressive figures of 5-27. Last man Maloney came out with seven overs to go and the third batting point still in reach. Although he managed a season's high score in the 2nd XI of six not out, Rahul was bowled by Varma for 12, one run short of 158 required to pick up three bonus points. Southwell were all out for 157 in the first ball of the 41st over.

Southwell had sunk to a 74 run defeat but had shown glimpses of promise throughout the match. Mathew bowled his full quota of 12 overs and should have earned more than just two wickets for his efforts, the fielding was strong throughout and the lower order managed to contribute almost 100 runs to the total. Indeed, it is also worth noting that all of the Southwell players had played before for the 2nd XI this season, something unique in 2017. Whilst Clifton thoroughly deserved the 20 points and were the better team on the day, Southwell continue to compete in the traditional spirit of cricket.